The Classy Gentleman Blog All things done by Corey A. Tyler

So yeah. I’ve finally gotten to hipster. I am attracted to t shirts with pikachu on them. O_O yep, you really just read that shit. Pikachu shirts are sexy. My perfect attraction is anyone who is not conventionally white, with long dark hair, lots of tats, piercings, and listens to ukulele music, while wearing a pikachu shirt, and doing graffiti. By not conventionally white I mean anyone who has really white skin, isn’t Caucasian, or is mixed with Caucasian, or is Asian. Anything mixed with black and white is automatically sexier. I’m so anti-Arian brotherhood, everything has to be mixed.

My birthday is next week. I’m not looking forward to it at all. I have no friends here, my family is pretty much ignoring it, and almost every one of my friends are a thousand miles away, and they will all forget. I’ll probably get a cute little card from my grandma that feels like gods pity, and I’m going to treat myself to a really nice meal at a cool place I found in eastown. I want to kill myself, quite literally right now. Someone hire me a birthday hitman please.

I just figured something else out about my girl, that, if it’s true means I’m going to break up with her. Which really fucking sucks. The girl I wish I could be with lives a thousand miles away, doesn’t know my name, doesn’t even know I exist, and of the times we’ve talked, it’s been a scattered bit of sentence structure that meant nothing to her, I’m almost certain. On top of that, I’ve got no job, I still have no friends in Michigan, all of my friends in Oklahoma are either ignoring me, or they don’t have their phones turned on, which gives my already paranoid mind the impression that it’s because of me that they turned them off. I’m just going to jump on my fucking moped and drive the hell away from everyone, and start a new life in some random place, selling something that no one else sells there. I’ll make a killing! A KILLING I SAY!!!

Fate. It has a funny way of showing up in places that you wouldn’t expect. It shows you the face of a beautiful angel, and then shows you the 666 tattooed on her ass that says she’s pure evil, and yet for the first time ever, you can’t look away. You learn about your self, then because you have that knowledge, you are changed. You thought you were one thing, but upon discovering that you actually are that thing, you become something entirely different. It’s like the entire idea behind the movie Next. The main character kept saying that because he had looked into the future, the future had changed. In the same way that this is true of reading and predicting the future, it is also true of self exploration. Once you have looked into who you are, discovered what you represent, what you think, what drives you, what makes you move, what really makes you tick, you become forever changed. You become forever different to who you are. Often the change you make when you finally learn yourself is either one of total transformation, or of utter destruction. I discovered that I am entirely driven by sex. That my whole being craves, burns, and seeks sex. I would literally do anything for it. Not just any sex either. Perfect sex. Where the girl is an absolute bombshell, and I am at my peak of performance. Every imperceptible movement, every underlying breath, every single atom of my being, electrified by those moments that drip with pure extatic energy. Where my blood is racing, a boiling, seething inferno of passion and hormones, as my teeth grasp at her flesh, and her nails bite into my back, and her head tilts back as she moans in the most primal and pleased fashion. It drives me as nothing ever has. To find that one woman that fits me like a glove, that feels that ever enticing physical longing, that shakes and vibrates as I do, with the energy of desirous, disgusting, uncontrolable passion. Do not think me some perverse monster. It would be far more than that. I am true to my upbringing, that sex is not purely important. You can not have sex and sex alone, as much as I wish it were so. No there would be a spark, or rather a perfect fire to the relationship. One of minds and hearts, where love was always felt, and kissing and holding are as welcome as her legs upon my face. But the true measure of our love would be found in its making. I find more beauty in a woman’s pleasure than in works of art, for there is the greatest beauty of all. A vision of absolute pleasure, bound in a mortal coil, as wondrous to behold as it is to be involved. I take great satisfaction in being that cause. It is a mind altering experience to be sure, and there is no end to its wonder. However, I digress, for this is not my only reason in writing today, after a month of separation from my beloved tumblr.

As I said, this was my personal self discovery. That something so clear, and so focused existed within me at all was a true surprise. Discovering that it encompassed a core aspect of my self was as great a shock as any. To some, this would be destructive to discover. After my years of fruitless attempts to find love, and not sex, this was truly a turn of which I could never have imagined. It was ultimately a life changing discovery, one that threatened to destroy me, and in the same stroke offered to remake me as I had always been. So I looked upon the reality of the discovery. I hadn’t discovered that I was attracted to anything different, I had simply enhanced the envisioned goal. I hadn’t become some twisted pervert, bent upon ascertaining my goals at the cost of lives, love, connection to my humanity, or my overall morals and ideals. I had simply discovered that contrary to my previous thoughts, sex and sexual appeal played a far greater role in what I was attracted to than I had previously realized. In all honesty, there was very little of me that had changed. I had been profoundly transformed for the better, into nothing more than myself. Thus, I found within my new knowledge, that I had gained nothing at all. I had simply lost an inhibition. Now fate has offered me something. Someone with whom I may find the things I so desire, or simply something better to view my dream with. I shall not shy from it.

So with all this said, I say to you my reader, search deep within and farther than you have ever searched. Find your self that you had not found, and remold it to fit what it truly should be. Make it into the who you are wholly, and within it place that knowledge. From it you can gain a devil or an angel. None the less, you must find it for your self.

I love getting checked out by cute girls. It’s really nice. A definite confidence booster. Oh by the way, I’m done being a whore. I wasn’t getting laid anyways, so I might as well do the emotionally stable intellectual rather than the being a dick. It’s a lot easier on my head and my heart. So yeah, IM BACK!!!!